oh..what a terrible feelings..

I hate it when things go wrong as they sometimes will

I hate it when someone care so much that it hurts

I hate it when you just have to say no when it supposed to be a yes

I hate it when things are so hard that you tend to work less

I hate it when I can’t tell lies

I hate it when I have to escape the entire time

I hate it when I really don’t hate so much…

Apa ya?

Terpanggil aku menulis coretan ini.

Bait-bait MERDEKA laungan Tunku Abdul Rahman seakan menyapa di telinga. Ya. Esok, Malaysia menginjak ke satu lagi tahun merdeka. 

Apa ya merdeka itu, buat anak watan di perantauan. Apa ya merdeka itu, untuk generasi tanpa sempadan.

Kita merdeka penuh diplomasi, bukan darah. Premis dan hujah di menara gading dulu bercerita tentang itu.

Betapa anak Malaysia kini enteng dengan patriotisme. Rela berjudikan maruah dan integriti mencari  kebebasan. Lagak moden berteriak bangga. Jiwa kekuatan negara telah pudar. Mereka tidak endah. Tak mahu kisah. Aku menyaksikan semua itu. Hampir tiap hari.

Selipar Jepun. Orang putih dan Mat Salleh. Mereka sentiasa ada di corong bicara kita. Kekal.

Lalu, bagaimana untuk kita merdeka di abad ini. Tinggalan pejuang kemerdekaan itu telah lampau. Kita perlu ingat.

Jati diri perwira dan srikandi kemerdekaan hari ini mesti teguh. Abad kolokial dan imperialis kita tinggal jauh. Kita cuba. Walau getir dan payah.

The ESCAPISM…..

Escapism…. haven’t heard in my entire undergrads life…

Doin’ research..had escapism for zillions of time…I guess, being a research student is a bit “bored” after all…well, if u consider that pile of journals and experiements to be conducted, hmm, not really tho..but, life is kinda the same..no thrills like in undergrad life..no fun to celebrate after classes or exams, no huge discussion for assignments et cetera…no bowling, lepaking, wayang together-gether (darn, I seriously miss the old time lah!)..it’s all by yrself now..with yr supervisor of course..and some friends (totally talk bout the school-if u gonna compare with undergard-plus, I’ve got plenty Msian here)..so, BORED is really relevant for me..therefore, I had to escape..had to break from this “boring” life..thus, ESCAPISM..

Some of u may ask..what actually ppl do in their escape (in relevant to the matter)..tons..all revolve around these major things: 1) internet 2) tv 3) movies 4) shopping complex 5) coffee shop or cafetaria 6) the forum

1) internet-blogging..hee..facebooking, youtube, tv3.online, local news (as in Malaysia), world news, games, wikipedia, yahoo messengger, bla bla bla..

2) tv-my major concern…hahaha

3) movies-sweet addiction…

4) shopping complex-kinda my must do thing with kak nono and julia in the weekend lately..will waste the time here when it’s REAL BORED or MOOD SWING..hehehhee..

5) coffee shop or cafeteria-personally my safe place in campus..hahaha..i’ll be like spending sometime too much for the morning coffee, then lunch, then afternoon tea..

6) the forum-ah, i just love forum…my endorphine just flooding in badminton play..sort of must-do-thing on weekend..and, swimming of course, not regular as it’s winter now, tho the pool and the room are heated, but really not feeling into-the-pool..haha

I have to add one more for me, it’s the novel thing, just finished with Stephanie Meyer’s twilight saga..now returned to my fav writer of all time-Patricia Cornwell, currently reading (or revised as I’ve read it b4): Jack the Ripper: Case Closed..probably going to the Book of the Dead next..and, I’ve the omnibus of three novels of her waiting to be read..waw..I really escape this time..hahhaha

You know what, I think if there’s no internet-or it could only be use to search journal and do academic thing, no facebook, no nothing, and no tv, no facilities to “escape”, I think I could really concentrate and focus on things that I definitely have to do..things that sometimes, because too much escape, that I’ve neglected them..things that what I came here really are for..which, I would picture myself then as a helpless nerd, with no need of social life, only could live with my chemistry things, don’t care about the world, left out of the current gossips…woo, that’s too much, aye..I’ve got to say that I am relieved that these escapisms existed..at least, my mind is still free, not depressed, happy.. hehe..=)

I’m “BUSTED”…hahahahha

Well u know, not really…

I kinda thought that no one..ever..ever wanna read the blog…hehe..but hey, mine is not a private blog or what-so-ever..so, having ppl to read the blog is kinda expected..I know, I shoulda feel exciting, awesome, etc..that my stuff got reviewed..

Tapi, rasa malu menerjah..kerna sebelum ini, dirasakan tiada yang membaca..menatap coretan yang entah apa-apa..hehe..oh ya, sebenarnya mungkin rasa malu andai salah satu karya bicara hati dibaca..yang lain itu tidak apa..haha..

Anyway, I got ”busted”..hahahahha….keep on reading people..yes, u know who u r..hahahha…and, thank YOU sOOOO much..

Problemo..

Problems..masalah…hmm..

Kita ini suma punya masalah sendiri..

Yang sudah berkahwin: masalah: susah mahu bahagi masa-anak lah, kerja lah, etc..

Yang belum kahwin: masalah: belum berjumpa pasangan, rasa begitu sendiri..

Yang sudah kerja: masalah: boss banyak cekadak, teman sekerja tunjuk lagak..

Yang masih belajar: exams, wang scholar yang macam tak pernah cukup…hehe

Yang undergrads: kena attend classes-hari-hari, exams takde rehat-masuk semua bab..

Yang postgrads: experiments failed, writing kena reject…

Yang jalan kaki: letih, takut.. 

Yang bawa kereta: minyak, servis, rego (kalau di malaysia-road tax), insurans..

Yang belum pernah ke luar negara: ah, mesti hidup di luar lebih baik, boleh ketemu mat salleh, minah salleh..barangkali ada jodoh?

Yang berada di luar negara: uwaaaa, mahu balik Malaysia..rindukan roti canai mamak, nasi lemak warung..

Yang kurus: ala, aku ini tiang..padan lah tiada yang berkenan..

Yang berisi: ala, siapalah mahukan aku ini..badan sudah la sebegini..

Itulah..kita ini suma ada masalah sendiri..tiada yang kurang..tiada yang lebih..tiada yang sempurna..

Jaaadiiii, BERSYUKURLAH!!!! haha

Perfect-ionist..

Ada masalah. terlalu perfect-ionist. terlalu sempurna. tiada yang terlalu sempurna dalam rumpun percaturan manusia. kecuali ciptaan Yang Maha Kuasa. tiada tolok bandingnya.

Boleh menjadi perfect-ionist. tapi jangan sampai memudarat diri. jangan hingga menutup periuk nasi sendiri. jangan merendah martabat diri. hanya kerana mahu dilihat yang terbaik. sungguh, yang terbaik itu tidak salah. cuma berpada-pada.

***entah, sehingga saat ini. tulisan akan bercampur edisi Hang Tuah dan Harry Potter. mudah. sebab kadangkala kita enak bicara bahasa sendiri. tapi, tinggal di bumi orang, perlu juga perkaya bahasa jajah**

No words in need..

No words in need

When the eyes met

When the heart pounds

When we know what’s in there-in our hearts..

Confirmation seminar, Tasmania and OIAM Season 3..

This past few weeks has been an amazing journey for me..

1)      24^th Apr 2009- Delivered my PhD confirmation seminar and had the verbal defence with the meeting panel…so far, alhamdulillah..

After the meeting, we had lunch, like to celebrate my work after it’s done..we went to Fire Station Hotel to have a brief (well, not really..) LUNCH..

I’m the only girl (or, lady if u like) there..the others were Ian van Altena (my supervisor), Ian Holland (research group and office mate), John Tulloch (office mate), Bob (confirmation panel coordinator), Prof. Jeff and Marcel (both are lecturers in the Chem Dept)..

We had various dishes-mine: Tasmanian scallops..the ONLY thing that I could stomached-even the fish and chips-the barramundi fish is beer battered..so,can’t eat..

Great FUN!!!

No photos tho..as, the lady who I ask help captured the pic was actually not doing it properly..hope it would still be memorable for a long time..

 

2)      25^th Apr 2009- off to Hobart, Tasmania with Kak Noni..

Road trip o Syd Airport Long Term Car Park- began the journey around 530am, arrived ~800am-killed the time with early breakfast on the way

Arrived @ Hobart around 1pm as our flight was delayed..(Plane-Jet Star)

Rent a car from Hertz..Nissan Tiida-I drove the second day..

Stayed: First night-@ Hatcher’s Manor-an old, historic beautiful cottage located in historical town called Richmond

Managed to visit-Salamanca Market, Tasmanian Devil Conservation Park, Port Arthur Historic Site, University of Tasmania and Hobart CBD..(we only have two days-the day in autumn is shorter..so ALL of these activities were some sort of rushed..with the lunch,dinner and driving time..)

Stayed: Second night-Quality Hotel Hobart Airport-only 2mins drive to the airport

Touched down Sydney on 27^th Apr 2009 at 1030am..(Plane-Virgin Blue)

Lunch @ restaurant Abang Sam (Syd Msian Hall chef) before headed back to Newcastle

AWESOME experience..!!

 (more pictures-in my facebook page)

3)      29 th Apr 2009 (Wed-Fri) No supervisor-but, still went to office..hahahha

On 28^th Apr btw, I did went to the office..proud of myself..it was such a short holiday..haha..back to work..!!

My supervisor visited his mum in Queensland (Wed-Sun)..usually in this type of time..all the escapism will occurred..but, alhamdulillah..still in the office every single day..

We even did our research group meeting tho he’s not around..and, it was great..!

I did had a task however, to deliver a talk about Colorimetric GTPAse assay in the next week group meeting..kerja kerja..haha

 

4)      1 May 2009- Tomok won OIAM!!!

One in a Million has been one of my favourite reality TV show since the first season (with FAizal Tahir and Alif) and season two (with ayu, shila, dayang)-Only the names of my fav contestants-

This season, my fav was Tomok..(adelagi la, couple of ppl..but he’s the one that I really obsessed about)

I know some of u would say, what??!! Tomok..??!! don’t u have someone else to adore..?! but hey, he’s changed.. A LOT (he used to be in a group with a very melodramatic song..called new boyz..hehe)

I love all his rendition or version of songs he delivered..

Fantastic and Awesome..like Faizal Tahir did in OIAM season1..

Wish him all the best and great luck..I believe he’ll have a very promising future in the music industry..

I like most of his performances-but posted only the “Hanya kau yang mampu” as this was the last performance of him in the final, beside “Rindu terhenti”-his own single wrote by Aubrey Suwito..Compare to the new song, this is funkier..hehe

 

5)                  More works to be done after this…hahahaha..

No more from victoriadavidbeckham.blogspot.com…

wargh..!! when DVB (nickname for the writer of the blog) said she would like to stop writing because Victoria Beckham has been very “boring” lately…, I personally thought she would change her mind..(boring-as in fashion and news) but No, today she already posted another sort of link for people to follow the story about Victoria..yup, we have to LOVE the work, to WORK..=)  As the interest is no longer there, no point of continuing the journey…I guess, have to start remember the link for the new blog..as that blog probably become my everyday blog..huhu..however, thanks so much DVB for creating such a lovely blog with so many followers…bye2 http://victoriadavidbeckham.blogspot.com

ugh..I forgot my adik’s bday..

it’s angah bday last Friday!!!! oh my..and I forgot that?!!! it’s seems impossible..I’d never left my bros or my parents bday behind…Maybe, this is what staying away from home has made me..noo…don’t want it…aite..I have to set things straight..this 5th of Apr is mak n ayah anniversary..so, please..ingat those..

and, for angah..this is what along will buy u insyaAllah for yr bday..probably, the canterburry jersey..(maybe la..)